The Power of Nice

    With all this awful stuff happening in our country, it helps to focus on the complete opposite.  I will stand by my thoughts of #yourlifematters because that’s how I live my life and nobody can argue that.  Instead of thinking black and white, I think about my college teammates and how we all bled Blue and Gold, no matter what we looked like on the outside.  Instead of thinking about the idiots we have as candidates, I think about Jeremy Faison and what he did for the children of TN and just hope that there are more like him out there.  I see people killing cops and I think of how proud I am of my friends Logan and Sweck and what they do on a daily basis.  I see Pokémon Go players and I still can’t figure that crap out so I have nothing for that.  I’ve tried lately to focus on the power of nice instead this shitstorm we live in.

    The only way I know how is to explain the power of nice is to give it a name, well the initial J.  J would shoot me if I said his name because he’s not here to get praise for being a good person.  Being nice is underrated these days.  It is usually seen as a sign of weakness in men, and being fake by women.  That’s how screwed up we all are.  We just can’t be nice, period.  There is this one person in my life, J, who by a few examples made my life better because who he is.  J I don’t think really cared about what people saw, instead he just wanted to be there and be a friend.  J has sat on the couch and held P in a couple of the toughest times that there were.  J called multiple times to just talk to me about 500 other things because he knew that’s what was needed.  J showed up to cry with me on the same couch that he once held Penelope.  J took care of my family in ways that they don’t know and I’m pretty sure I don’t know to the full extent.

    J is just an example to me of what we should all try to do daily.  If you think somebody needs something, you take a minute out of your dang life and reach out to them.  If you have the means to do something for somebody at any level, you do it.  You don’t do it for some type of reward or recognition.  Those people suck and we all know who they are and yes I’ve come across them in this life that we have been dealt.  You laugh with people, you cry with them, and you genuinely have feelings for another human being and what they are going through. What I’m saying though is look at your friends and are you taking care of each other?  This world is going down the drain and divisions are happening every day.  The power of being nice won’t reverse all this, I’m not an idiot.  You don’t have to seek out a certain cause or child, but just start with your friends.  Your friends need you in more ways than you think.  Dr. Jason Horne, one of the smartest and nicest human beings on this planet, (who also has a pretty incredible twin brother) said to me one time, “I’m happy that you are happy and that’s all I need.”  Not a bad way to think ya know.

4th and 1

   Life has to go on as much as I don’t want it to sometimes.  In a way, life sort of resumed this week.  By life, I mean football and reading school emails.  To say my mind is a combination of every natural disaster put together would be an understatement, but there are things that have to be done.  School and football pay the bills, and bills have to be paid.  The whistle still needs to be blown, plays still need to be called, and kids still need somebody to talk to.  I look at it all though way differently now, especially after the first week back.

  I needed football more than football needed me.

   I work my tail off and would like to think that I’m a pretty decent coach.  I’m replaceable though, and if I never came back, the game of football would never miss a beat.  The Greene Devils would be just fine. 

   I only say that because going back to the fieldhouse was a difficult decision for me.  More difficult than anyone knows or that I’ll go into detail about.  I can’t look at the bleachers without seeing my little girl in her Mom’s arms in the 3^rd row 2^nd seat.  I can’t look in the corner of the endzone without picturing meeting them there after a game and getting to hold her.  It’s hard to stand on the sidelines without staring into the sky and wondering if she’s watching everything that’s going on.  My sunglasses hide tears that I can play off as sweat, because it is hotter than 7 hells on that turf sometimes.

   These kids don’t know that though.  They probably know I’m struggling a little bit.  They probably get that I’m not the same as I was before.  They haven’t changed a bit.  I still have to look at them flex on me because deep down they know I’m proud of their work even when I call them small.  The big boys think twice about that 2^nd sandwich because they know I’ve been there too.  They still sit on my desk all nasty even though they know it pisses me off and just smile when I walk in the room and catch them.  I still say “WTF” to myself about 50 times a day wondering what goes through their minds. 

   As I laid down to sleep last night though, I realized I needed that.  I realized in some way, shape, or form, they still needed me just a little.  One kid said, “It’s nice to have you back Coach, I missed you out here.”  With that one sentence, I was ok again, I made the right decision.

   You can change sweaty, smelly high school boys and a game into whatever you want to when something like this happens.  People lose children, parents, and friends every single day.  Death is something that we will never master dealing with.  It takes words from your mouth and turns your days into disasters.  Losing someone you love more than life itself takes the joy and happiness out of your life in an instant.  Their life is over, but yours must go on.  You have to find joy again in something.  I was lucky enough for it to find me on the 20 yard line.  I needed football more than football would ever need me.